Common Photography Terms, What They Mean, and How to Use Them
March 21, 2015 Andy Hutchinson
Is it satire, or is it sober journalism? Whatever it is, it’s right-on, and squirmingly funny. Andy Hutchinson has the stones to say out loud what many of us were thinking. In [this] clever send-up of 24 photography terms representing sacred cows that some photographers (but certainly not you) hold dear, Hutchinson leaves no sacred cow un-tipped.
Perhaps you’d like some free samples? Sure. Why not. No, really: it’s no trouble at all. Let’s start with the one he starts with.
“Fine Art Photography – long exposure shots of ocean piers or railway platforms in black and white. Nearly always practiced by photographers seeking to distance themselves from ‘ordinary’ photographers by the simple process of shooting mind-bogglingly dull subjects.”
Ouch. Did he say that OUT LOUD? And how about this one:
“Street photography – homeless people and street vendors photographed without their knowledge by people with Leicas and beards.”
In Andy Hutchinson’s lexicon, Bokeh is Japanese for “blurry blobs,” and Glass is a (regrettably, we are given to understand) “hipster-ish way of referring to lenses.”
Zing! Here are a couple more of the photography terms Andy defines for us:
A Kit lens is a “disparaging way of referring to the lenses that are bundled with DSLRs. Owners of said lenses are made to feel that they are inferior ‘glass’ (see above) that should be drop-kicked into a rubbish bin….” And—you’re gonna like this one—a Landscape Photographer is a “semi-autistic person who likes spending long periods on their own and didn’t fancy taking up fishing.”
Lest you should feel a bit tender due to one of Hutchinson’s well-aimed blows, he wishes you to know that it’s all in fun, and he’s as guilty as anyone. Perhaps it will soon be your turn to mock one of his sacred cows.
Until then, may your bokeh be merry and bright.